Come Home And I’ll Throw The Biggest Party Heaven Has Ever Seen
April 18
Luke 15:7 “I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who do not need to repent.”
I’ve briefly written in a few previous entries about the night I surrendered my life and addiction to God in August 2020. After living with a pornography addiction for thirty-eight years (I saw my first magazine at age 10, and my surrender happened weeks shy of my 48th birthday), I finally hit rock bottom tired and exhausted with trying to manage, live, survive, and thrive doing things my way. For nearly four decades, I lived believing I could handle and control the addiction in my life. I believed in God, attended church, occasionally read my Bible, prayed from time to time, and even did some tithing. As long as I was doing some of the right things (some of the time), that would be enough to appease God and keep Him from being too angry at me while avoiding any consequences for the addiction. Even as I type this, I know how crazy and absurd this sounds. But that is how I lived and what I believed for so many years.
I had read The Parable of the Lost Sheep in Luke 15 many times and this verse about the rejoicing in Heaven for one sinner who repents. I was familiar with The Parable of the Prodigal Son which follows just a few short verses later. The scene in verse 20 where the Father rushed out to meet His son, embraced him, kissed him, welcomed him home, and then threw a big party seemed too good to be true. In moments of clarity, I knew I was a prodigal son and desired to be welcomed home by the Father. But, I felt too far gone from Him. I believed all of my sins, choices, and mistakes I made because of the addiction were far greater than God’s love and forgiveness could reach. I had gone off and lived foolishly. I left the Father and went my own way believing I knew better and that I didn’t need Him in my life. Looking back, it was a miserable way to live. There was so much restlessness, inner turmoil, and chaos even though I continued chasing after things that promised to make me happy and comfortable.
Finally, like the prodigal son, I “came to my senses” and realized the way I was living was not good. I was miserable and ready for a change - ready to come back home to the Father. Although it was a message on Psalm 51 that caused me to surrender in August of 2020, The Parable of the Prodigal Son also came to mind that night. When I read verse 20 where the Father saw His son a long way off, had compassion on him, ran to him, threw His arms around him, and kissed him - I cried for a long time. This was me! I surrendered that night. I repented of my sins. I confessed the wrong I had done with the addiction. I had made the decision to turn around and go back home. The Father welcomed me back home that night. I felt Him embracing me. I felt His forgiveness and love in a powerful and new way that night. In the parable there was a great celebration complete with a feast, a robe, and a ring*. The son who was dead is alive again. The son who was lost is now found. That son is me.
I’m not sure exactly what rejoicing in Heaven looks like when a sinner repents. I don’t know what the celebration entails when a sinner repents and comes back home. But, reading the details of the “welcome home party” for the prodigal son, I’m confident it is no small affair. I envision a celebration beyond my wildest dreams. It is a big deal - a matter of eternal life or death - when a sinner repents. I try to imagine all of Heaven rejoicing when I repented and came back home. Imagine all of Heaven celebrating with an exquisite and extravagant feast because I “came to my senses” and came back to the Father. A Father’s love that is so tenacious, so relentless, and so tender that it calls a sinner - like me - to repentance. A love that welcomes me back. A love that throws a grand celebration. A love that sent His Son to the cross to pay for my sins. A love that will one day welcome me home to eternal life. Oh, what a celebration that will be!
*I enjoy writing lyrics. In the last year and a half, I’ve written lyrics every week. After one of the weekly recovery meetings where we discussed the parable of the prodigal son, I wrote these lyrics: “A Feast, A Robe, and A Ring.”